think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
