In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
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so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
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I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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