you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize