Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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