And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
