on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
