Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
