hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
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