Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
