She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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