Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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