he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
