proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
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