I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize