It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize