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• (509): View more from Washington

  Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol

  (661): View more from California

  HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator

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• (315): View more from New York

  Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?

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• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (360): View more from Washington

  It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.

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• (415): View more from California

  get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.

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• 

  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (314): View more from Missouri

  I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Typical.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  We turned a wake into a bar crawl.

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