you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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