It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
