If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
