And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
