the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
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i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
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