Your tits are I can't wait for
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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