then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Randomize
