Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
