6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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