Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
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then he tried to convert me to islam
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
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Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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