ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
