Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I can't put those talents on a resume
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
