Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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