just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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