using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
