imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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