At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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