matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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