I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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