You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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