not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
