had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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