and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
