Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize