I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
