This is not my ceiling
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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