I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
