Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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