He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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