IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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