The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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