Your dad touched me again.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize