He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
