He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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