i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I think my vagina is haunted
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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